antilib
Nov 8th, 2009, 4:45 PM
A little taste of life in the next ten years...(A parody)
WORLD CONTROL
Life under WORLD CONTROL
" Anarchy. When I first heard that our world society would be ruled by anarchists, I began to worry about a one-world government. But less than a year after they took over, World Control had me out of debt and into a brand new career as a political assassin."
----------- Hassad Jhad, Iraq
"World Control has made such a difference in my life. Before World Control took over, my mortgage was almost foreclosed, and my Husband and I always argued over Finances. Now today, we have a new home, a new car, and two great jobs."
----------------- Arienna Tighe, Morocco
"I was ready to join the Army when World Control took over. But after I saw that they could make ground warfare obsolete, I opened a bowling alley."
----------------- Grayson Flook, Maryland
"I never thought I'd be somebody. In Kentucky, a black man don't have no opportunity. But after World Control took over, I was given a job, an apartment and a car. If I wanted to keep it, all I had to do was keep working.."
---------------- Rastus Maggard, Kentucky
These are just a few of the Billions of people who have found WORLD CONTROL to be a source of both pride and security for the future. And if you aren't amongst them, here is what you can expect once WORLD CONTROL takes over YOUR Government..........
You will notice some changes during the TRANSITION PERIOD that precedes the final turnover of Power. During the Transition Period, WORLD CONTROL Consultants spend 12-20 weeks meeting with your former Government, and formulating plans for improvements by utilizing it's worldwide assets. During this time, your former state governments (if applicable] are also involved in transitional activities. This ensures a smooth transaction for the control of public services such as Police, Fire, Hospitals, Health and Sanitation, and Utilities.
"The first thing I noticed was that all the Politicians were gone."
--------------- Gwen Haaberschadt, Germany
Every new member of WORLD CONTROL is given a medical and dental examination. Any anomalies are remedied by WORLD CONTROL physicians and health care providers. Then, you are issued your own, personal WORLD CONTROL I.D number and card. During your physical examination, a microchip containing your ID number is painlessly implanted. This chip will help find you if you are lost, and will be a constant and unalterable form of identification.
"I feel so much more secure knowing that little chip is inside me."
-------------- Rosalee Fhilgher, Sri Lanka
After Transition, you'll notice immediate changes. The initials 'WC' will be embossed on the Uniforms of all general employees and public services. Those wearing business attire will be identified with the WORLD CONTROL Globe patch on their shirt and coat pockets.
You'll see the name 'WORLD CONTROL' on everything from Police and Fire vehicles, Garbage Trucks and Taxicabs, to Automobiles and Groceries. It's a daily reminder of who makes life so enjoyable for you.
"When I see a WORLD CONTROL car or truck on the street, I feel so much safer."
---------------------- Shanay Hawksbreath, Bronx, NY
WORLD CONTROL, and their team of highly qualified professionals, will meet personally with every new member for an evaluation. Your intelligence, capabilities, talents and attitude towards WORLD CONTROL will be assessed, and a decision made as to your new role in this new way of living. Should your talents benefit WORLD CONTROL in a more efficient fashion, you may be required to be re-trained and relocated to another position which best suits WORLD CONTROL..
"I was a bricklayer. Then, World Control helped me realize I had the talent to manage a beauty salon. They believed in me when others wouldn't."
---------------------- Ansonio Celeste, Italy
All able-bodied members must work in some capacity. Depending on the position you are assigned, you will work a minimum of ten hours a day, but no more than 18 hours a day. Those who work will be able to keep their possessions such as real estate, cars, luxury items and all personal assets. Those that do not work, will be removed of their possessions and placed in segregated walled communities until such time they agree to return to work.
A society under WORLD CONTROL works!
To assure your security, and to ensure WORLD CONTROL can best benefit you, all working members undergo a monthly financial review by a WORLD CONTROL Financial Advisor. Budgets are prepared, and the member is relieved of worry. You will know exactly how much money you have to spend. You will know that your bills are paid, and you'll have more time to enjoy with your friends and family.
Under WORLD CONTROL, you'll see a decrease in Crime. Strict Termination Penalties are assessed against Criminals and Repeated Offenders. Prison overcrowding will never be a problem under WORLD CONTROL. For we believe that the best way to solve a problem is to eliminate it.
"Before World Control, I had Crack dealers lining the streets in my Neighborhood. But when World Control came in here, All them bad boys were gone. Never seen em' again. I can even walk to the Bingo games again. Thanks, World Control."
----------- Edna Blazer, age 82, East Los Angeles
As you become accustomed to Life under WORLD CONTROL, you'll begin to experience a feeling of peace and tranquility. Under WORLD CONTROL, you will no longer have to face the daily worries that once plagued you. You need plan only what you want to do in your spare time.
On a Global scale, Peace is the Number One export of WORLD CONTROL. Nations which once fought---both internally and outside their borders, are now at Peace. Countries which were once Divided by Political or Religious conflicts are now co-existing in an atmosphere of harmony and goodwill------ all working members of WORLD CONTROL.
For those yet to be Born, there is nothing but optimism for their futures. For they will be Born to, and always know a World that's safe, and one in which WORLD CONTROL takes a personal interest in.
"I sit out on my porch at night and sometimes ask myself 'How did Life go on before World Control?'
-------------- Cynthia Turner, Belfast
In the 60's, people took acid to make the world weird. Now the world is weird and people take Prozac to make it normal.
WORLD CONTROL
Life under WORLD CONTROL
" Anarchy. When I first heard that our world society would be ruled by anarchists, I began to worry about a one-world government. But less than a year after they took over, World Control had me out of debt and into a brand new career as a political assassin."
----------- Hassad Jhad, Iraq
"World Control has made such a difference in my life. Before World Control took over, my mortgage was almost foreclosed, and my Husband and I always argued over Finances. Now today, we have a new home, a new car, and two great jobs."
----------------- Arienna Tighe, Morocco
"I was ready to join the Army when World Control took over. But after I saw that they could make ground warfare obsolete, I opened a bowling alley."
----------------- Grayson Flook, Maryland
"I never thought I'd be somebody. In Kentucky, a black man don't have no opportunity. But after World Control took over, I was given a job, an apartment and a car. If I wanted to keep it, all I had to do was keep working.."
---------------- Rastus Maggard, Kentucky
These are just a few of the Billions of people who have found WORLD CONTROL to be a source of both pride and security for the future. And if you aren't amongst them, here is what you can expect once WORLD CONTROL takes over YOUR Government..........
You will notice some changes during the TRANSITION PERIOD that precedes the final turnover of Power. During the Transition Period, WORLD CONTROL Consultants spend 12-20 weeks meeting with your former Government, and formulating plans for improvements by utilizing it's worldwide assets. During this time, your former state governments (if applicable] are also involved in transitional activities. This ensures a smooth transaction for the control of public services such as Police, Fire, Hospitals, Health and Sanitation, and Utilities.
"The first thing I noticed was that all the Politicians were gone."
--------------- Gwen Haaberschadt, Germany
Every new member of WORLD CONTROL is given a medical and dental examination. Any anomalies are remedied by WORLD CONTROL physicians and health care providers. Then, you are issued your own, personal WORLD CONTROL I.D number and card. During your physical examination, a microchip containing your ID number is painlessly implanted. This chip will help find you if you are lost, and will be a constant and unalterable form of identification.
"I feel so much more secure knowing that little chip is inside me."
-------------- Rosalee Fhilgher, Sri Lanka
After Transition, you'll notice immediate changes. The initials 'WC' will be embossed on the Uniforms of all general employees and public services. Those wearing business attire will be identified with the WORLD CONTROL Globe patch on their shirt and coat pockets.
You'll see the name 'WORLD CONTROL' on everything from Police and Fire vehicles, Garbage Trucks and Taxicabs, to Automobiles and Groceries. It's a daily reminder of who makes life so enjoyable for you.
"When I see a WORLD CONTROL car or truck on the street, I feel so much safer."
---------------------- Shanay Hawksbreath, Bronx, NY
WORLD CONTROL, and their team of highly qualified professionals, will meet personally with every new member for an evaluation. Your intelligence, capabilities, talents and attitude towards WORLD CONTROL will be assessed, and a decision made as to your new role in this new way of living. Should your talents benefit WORLD CONTROL in a more efficient fashion, you may be required to be re-trained and relocated to another position which best suits WORLD CONTROL..
"I was a bricklayer. Then, World Control helped me realize I had the talent to manage a beauty salon. They believed in me when others wouldn't."
---------------------- Ansonio Celeste, Italy
All able-bodied members must work in some capacity. Depending on the position you are assigned, you will work a minimum of ten hours a day, but no more than 18 hours a day. Those who work will be able to keep their possessions such as real estate, cars, luxury items and all personal assets. Those that do not work, will be removed of their possessions and placed in segregated walled communities until such time they agree to return to work.
A society under WORLD CONTROL works!
To assure your security, and to ensure WORLD CONTROL can best benefit you, all working members undergo a monthly financial review by a WORLD CONTROL Financial Advisor. Budgets are prepared, and the member is relieved of worry. You will know exactly how much money you have to spend. You will know that your bills are paid, and you'll have more time to enjoy with your friends and family.
Under WORLD CONTROL, you'll see a decrease in Crime. Strict Termination Penalties are assessed against Criminals and Repeated Offenders. Prison overcrowding will never be a problem under WORLD CONTROL. For we believe that the best way to solve a problem is to eliminate it.
"Before World Control, I had Crack dealers lining the streets in my Neighborhood. But when World Control came in here, All them bad boys were gone. Never seen em' again. I can even walk to the Bingo games again. Thanks, World Control."
----------- Edna Blazer, age 82, East Los Angeles
As you become accustomed to Life under WORLD CONTROL, you'll begin to experience a feeling of peace and tranquility. Under WORLD CONTROL, you will no longer have to face the daily worries that once plagued you. You need plan only what you want to do in your spare time.
On a Global scale, Peace is the Number One export of WORLD CONTROL. Nations which once fought---both internally and outside their borders, are now at Peace. Countries which were once Divided by Political or Religious conflicts are now co-existing in an atmosphere of harmony and goodwill------ all working members of WORLD CONTROL.
For those yet to be Born, there is nothing but optimism for their futures. For they will be Born to, and always know a World that's safe, and one in which WORLD CONTROL takes a personal interest in.
"I sit out on my porch at night and sometimes ask myself 'How did Life go on before World Control?'
-------------- Cynthia Turner, Belfast
In the 60's, people took acid to make the world weird. Now the world is weird and people take Prozac to make it normal.