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View Full Version : Roland Emmerich's 2012 Review by Stabby Joe



Stabby Joe
Nov 16th, 2009, 3:59 PM
This review is from my the local media outlet of which I write for and ispublished, it's a basic and laid back review for the casual readers. There's a lot more I could say about it, more so about the prediction itself with you guys here on AO... but oh well:


2012
(Directed by Ronald Emmerich, running time 158 minutes)


http://screencrave.com/wp-content/uploads/2009/09/2012-newphotos-922-full-09.jpg
John Cusack has had better days in 2012

DISCLAIMER: Before I dive in let me get one thing out of the way: I do not believe in the 2012 predictions nor should any of you. There is no evidence the Mayans ended their calendar for this reason (with no other reason to believe them even if they did) and no scientific evidence to support other predictions of impending cataclysms. It is purely fiction.

So we meet again Mr. Ronald Emmerich, back after the ludicrous Independence Day, misunderstood Godzilla, poorly executed Day After Tomorrow and downright confusing 10, 000 BC? And now you’re taking on the next Y2K? Sounds like a recipe for disaster, even if it may be a well executed disaster. Considering all of these films are hardly Oscar Gold, to go into the cinema with expectations beyond “big dumb action flick” only to then complain about it would be on par with visiting France and being surprised and annoyed by all the French people. By no means does that spare this film from a critical lashing, just don’t say I or even the film trailers didn’t tell you so.

It’s 2012, the always tolerable John Cusack plays amateur novelist Jackson Curtis, divorced whose two children live with their mother and cut in step father... *Strains* I’m already annoyed by how cliché this set up really is. Before the exposition can sink in further, on a camping trip Curtis is warned by new age doomsayer Charlie Frost played by Woody Harrelson (arguably the most likable and entertaining character who isn’t even used beyond the first half) of the impending apocalyptic prophecy handed down from the ancient Mayan people among other civilizations. Shortly after Curtis connects the dots including the rich and powerful leaving urbanized areas, disaster abruptly unfolds with California sinking into the ocean in a scene thats as jaw dropping as it is over the top. If that wasn’t enough to raise a few eyebrows, Yellowstone super volcano erupts engulfing most of America while the rest of the world follows suit, all the while Curtis and family journey to China where an ark project is about to be launched saving the soon to be remnants of humanity.


http://www.canyon-news.com/artman2/uploads/2/2012-D.jpg
Trust me, this scene is as over the top as it looks.

While this set up appears as a half-baked excuse to travel round the globe just as it goes to pot (and it is), to mix it up we cut to and fro from other would be survivors as they deal with the constant raging chaos. While the spotlight is primarily focused on the US President played by Danny Glover (a’la Morgan Freeman in Deep Impact) and pre-disaster concerned scientist played by Chiwetel Ejiofor (a character who screams “know your place Miiister Siiientist!”), we also get two jazzmen on a damned cruise, a Chinese monk leading his family through the backdoor of the ark and of course random cut aways to famous locations in the process of natural demolition. It’s a nice touch, especially with the ones you know are doomed from the beginning, taking away the cliché foundations the rest of the films rests upon. Others on the other hand do nothing but support it, such as dire European accents, impossibly good plane driving from someone who claims to be a learner and of course the coming together of a once broken family... did I already mention cliché? Dam. All in all the characters shouldn’t annoy you too much... unlike the dim-witted ignorant “douche-bag” teens of Transformers.

But of course you’re not here for the exposition (at one point I said in my head “I don’t care about how you weren’t around for the kids, I just saw the whole Vatican turn over!”), you want destruction on the grandest of scales and if you were disappointed with there lack of in The Day After Tomorrow, this should quell your catharsis. Earthquakes, volcanoes and tsunamis are part of the main course with plenty of landmarks to knock down and as it stands I wouldn’t have it any other way. When they’re not laying on the exposition, the special effects crew are hammering in as much worldly mayhem as possible to create the ultimate disaster flick. And while you get a good sense of the world actually ending, it’s also not edited in an overly fast pace manner to the point of breaking the sound barrier, allowing the many destructive set pieces to make their full impact you came to see.

Like I said from the very start, this is a film of simple tastes. You go for the mass destruction and you get it... a lot. In fact you would be better off to set your exceptions and standards even lower, because in all honesty it’s well executed and might even surprise you. Like all disaster flicks, the plot is so cliché the word loses all meaning and the dialogue can get hammy at times but at least it doesn’t try to make you laugh or be “down with the kids”. I know it might not be saying much but this is one of the better Ronald Emmerich films, IE a fine example of a movie-goer’s guilty pleasure.

Also stars Amanda Peet, Thandie Newton and Oliver Platt.

PanamaGuy
Nov 17th, 2009, 12:37 PM
I still wanna see it, it looks entertaining at the least.

Mezurashi
Nov 18th, 2009, 8:58 AM
what I find highly entertaining is the calls from the critics that the movie looks too over the top - and yet they Know this is Roland Emmerich's latest spectacle offering.

this reminds me of the criticism of the Star Wars Episodes 1 thru 3 where the Lack Of Dramatic Arcs and Wooden Acting were hauled up to light. these sorts of criticisms always make me ask, "What the Hell did you expect? It's fucking George Lucas for Christ's Sake!"

over the top - too unbelievable - typical stuff ...

and I ask again - from this man, What Else Would You Expect?

and once more for the back seats - If You think you can make a better movie go right ahead, I'll wait for the premiere ...

of course it's over the top and silly, it's fucking Roland Emmerich. you might as well expect a serious and deep movie from Michael Bay or Joel Silver ...

3rDShifT
Nov 18th, 2009, 10:11 AM
what I find highly entertaining is the calls from the critics that the movie looks too over the top - and yet they Know this is Roland Emmerich's latest spectacle offering.

this reminds me of the criticism of the Star Wars Episodes 1 thru 3 where the Lack Of Dramatic Arcs and Wooden Acting were hauled up to light. these sorts of criticisms always make me ask, "What the Hell did you expect? It's fucking George Lucas for Christ's Sake!"

over the top - too unbelievable - typical stuff ...

and I ask again - from this man, What Else Would You Expect?

and once more for the back seats - If You think you can make a better movie go right ahead, I'll wait for the premiere ...

of course it's over the top and silly, it's fucking Roland Emmerich. you might as well expect a serious and deep movie from Michael Bay or Joel Silver ...

I agree Mez, especially of your example with George Lucas. You had to remember, this was the guy who gave us "Howard the Duck"!
2012 still looks like a fun flick to see.

Anyvay.

Who care's it's just a movie right!

Um, am I right...................?

Stabby Joe
Nov 18th, 2009, 10:41 AM
what I find highly entertaining is the calls from the critics that the movie looks too over the top - and yet they Know this is Roland Emmerich's latest spectacle offering.

this reminds me of the criticism of the Star Wars Episodes 1 thru 3 where the Lack Of Dramatic Arcs and Wooden Acting were hauled up to light. these sorts of criticisms always make me ask, "What the Hell did you expect? It's fucking George Lucas for Christ's Sake!"

over the top - too unbelievable - typical stuff ...

and I ask again - from this man, What Else Would You Expect?

and once more for the back seats - If You think you can make a better movie go right ahead, I'll wait for the premiere ...

of course it's over the top and silly, it's fucking Roland Emmerich. you might as well expect a serious and deep movie from Michael Bay or Joel Silver ...

Exactly, hence why I got that out of the way at the start. I brought the film up to someone who hadn't seen it and he was quick to respond "it looks like a stupid OVER THE TOP disaster film"... well, yeah. The whole point of this movie was to be the most over the top and thats why people went in the first place.

Roger Ebert for example enjoyed it for this reason.

Of course these films could and can be better in the other departments, but so far are standards for disaster flicks have yet to have been raised. One example, I DON'T like Transformers because I think its not well made/paced well enough to other films of its type.

However I should point out that the new Star Wars were met unfavorably since they were simply not as good as the original trilogy (although 3 was close enough).


Anyvay.

Who care's it's just a movie right!

Um, am I right...................?

Yes. There is no shame in going to see a film for pure entertainment, that's what they were made for in the first place.

3rDShifT
Nov 18th, 2009, 10:47 AM
Considering some of the "B movies" I like, I think I could make it through 2012!
The movie at least..... LOL!!

Stabby Joe
Nov 18th, 2009, 10:56 AM
Considering some of the "B movies" I like, I think I could make it through 2012!
The movie at least..... LOL!!

Some B-Movies are so cliche they're actually good. 20 Million Miles to Earth is a great example of this with lines such as:

"We believe the monster came from Venus?"
"Venus?"
"The Planet Venus?"

http://skepticalteacher.files.wordpress.com/2009/07/facepalm1.jpg

3rDShifT
Nov 18th, 2009, 11:04 AM
Yes! I love those old movies Stabby! Kind of like Plan 9 from Outer Space, or any of the old Gamera films! Horrilble but lovable!

Nu Kua
Nov 18th, 2009, 12:36 PM
You wrote that review, Stabby? You're a good writer and should be writing articles for the front page.

As for the film, being a somewhat boring person, I hate these types of films in general. One is just like the other and they are all so predictable, I've not even been vaguely interested in seeing it, but my son and bf want to see it, as this sort of thing is right up their alley.
(Action Packed Adventure Doomsday! Whoo!)

PanamaGuy
Nov 18th, 2009, 3:38 PM
I wanna see it, but I have heard from people who have seen it that its special effects are way over the top, but hey, still wanna see it.